Life Out Of Focus

by Y on March 30, 2020

Life Out of FocusLife is out of focus. I’m out of focus. In the midst of chaos it’s easy to loose focus on what can keep us grounded and together. It is a mindful practice I have to actively do, and strive to do (and sometimes forget to do), but I find that practicing gratitude helps. Not always, but sometimes. What do I mean? Gratitude for all we have in this moment. This one. As a good friend of mine has always said to me over the years, tomorrow isn’t promised to any of us. There are so many times in life, where our actions and inactions can affect others, but for sure that is massively truth NOW. I am relying on you, and you are relying on me, we are relying on each other.

Small sacrifice to help yourself and others….to live, have the chance to live. I lived through the Northridge earthquake, I lived through 9/11. I was one of the people running from the building (my apt was 2 blocks from ground zero), but I’ve never lived through something like this. It’s scary, for me, as it is for others…. It creates a lot of anxiety. It takes me 20 minutes to open a package between wiping down the door handles, the box or package… wash hands, wipe scissors, wash hands discard boxes, wipe handles, wash hands. It’s a new normal right now, I have asthma and worry tremendously how my body would respond to this virus. While everyone stocked up on toliet paper and paper towels, I stocked up on my inhalers and meds for my nebulizer. I have a fairly poor immune system as it is, always have. When someone gets a cold, I’m down for 2 weeks. When someone gets the runs from bad food eaten in a restaurant (having eaten same food as me) I’m hospitalized for food poisoning. Stress flares my rosacea into a burning mess flares my asthma, so it’s important to try and not stress, which I feel for an anxiety person like me, is like saying, don’t breathe, but I’ve grown to accept that’s just how it is. I just do my best. Staying home, it’s something I can do to help me, and those around me. Be kind to yourself, practice self care, practice gratitude.

Sending my love to all !
~ Y

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