Intro To Alopecia Video By WHLP Member, “Hellcat”

by Y on February 6, 2014

In this video, WHLP member, Hellcat, vlogs about her hair loss story. I loveeeee this video, I love the openness and honesty and it’s so amazing to actually be able to hear and see another woman discuss her dealings with hair loss. Beautiful. xoxo

{ 36 comments… read them below or add one }

AMD53 February 6, 2014 at 10:26 am

LOVE this video – I especially like the part where you say that you understand women saying “no to life.” I have done that and “sometimes” still do – although I am much better than a few years ago… THANK YOU….


lina February 6, 2014 at 10:42 am

Thank you! For sharing of yourself and of this extremely difficult journey.
This site is a safe haven, a hug, a saviour… I can hear a thousand stories and they all seem to carry the same raw emotions – it is so familiar, so familiar.
I guess it’s because it hits the exact same core for each of us. We are women, hair is such a huge part of femininity – there is no shortage of magazine ads, tv ads and products out there, I mean you’re bombarded by them!
The camaraderie that you speak of is how I feel too. I’m sad that others are suffering but thankful to share with those who truly know and feel the same as I. It doesn’t bring back my hair but at least it gives me more strength to deal.
You are a lovely, strong individual and I am so grateful to add you to my list of sisters.
Can’t wait for more videos.

have a happy day
Lina xo


andrea February 6, 2014 at 10:58 am

<3! thank you so much for this!


B February 6, 2014 at 11:59 am

Thanks Hellcat for your story. I can relate. We are so lucky to live in a time where we can relate and share and talk in the way we do. It’s still a struggle but it definitely helps the struggle. Thanks again.


Jennifer February 7, 2014 at 6:46 am

I am so, so relieved I stumbled across this project. Today is one of those days I’ve been obsessing about how much hair I’ve lost, and even though I have so much work to do, I’ve been Googling about the topic for the majority of the day.

Both my mother and her mother are/were nearly bald, so I shouldn’t be too surprised, but, like you, I expected it to start later. Also, my hair texture is more like my father’s, and I had more than my mother every did, so I hoped I’d take after his side of the family. Apparently not.

In the course of a year I’ve gone from having long, full hair (used to consider it one of my best features) to dry, stringy, very thin hair. I’ve tried a whole myriad of vitamins (including Viviscal) and a variety of shampoos. I’ve better my diet and increased my exercise, in hopes of improving my overall health, but nothing has helped.

I’ve been to doctors and undergone various tests, but everything is in “normal range.” Like you, I’ve HOPED to be diagnosed with something, just so I could work on fixing it. I was slightly low for iron, so I was prescribed supplements, but nothing has changed.

I moved from NYC to London about a year ago, so part of my hopes the stress that goes along with that may have triggered it, and by reducing stress it may help? Also, it’s notoriously grey here, so part of me holds out hope that getting more vitamin D in my diet my help improve things. Probably not. Also with London is notoriously hard water, which I chose to believe isn’t helping things.

To continue with this insanely long post, I did start taking the Pill again, but one that’s supposed to be good (or at least not detrimental) for your hair. I was on it for several years, then took about 3 years off. My shedding started before I went back on it, so I figured I might as go well on it again, as it was more important as my relationship status had changed.

Basically, I’m so happy I found this. Even though I knew I wasn’t the only one, it helps to be reminded of that…though it does break my heart to think there are so many others going through this.

Thanks for sharing.


Hellcat February 7, 2014 at 3:59 pm

Hi Ladies! Thank you so much for your comments, and Jennifer thank you for sharing your story, I feel like I’ve lived this with you -aside from NYC and London, though I’ve visited both :). The comments and responses to the videos and posts have had such an impact on me. I feel like we have connections with women here that are totally unique and important. Lina- you hit the nail on the head! More and more I really feel the sisterhood here. I’m on this site like everyday and plan on sharing as much of my hair thoughts and experiences as I can. It is truly humbling that they can make a difference for somebody. What we would give for all of us to have our gorgeous hair back, but if we cant have that I am so grateful to have you all <3


Mercurie February 7, 2014 at 7:19 pm

You made me cry and then I felt much better. πŸ™‚ Thank you so much for this! It was just what I needed when I needed it. I like to think of myself as strong but I have these terrible days. I grew up with thick red hair and all anyone ever complimented me on was my hair. I hit my mid-20s and the loss started slowly. I had so much to begin with that it falling out slowly didn’t show as much. It picked up in my thirties somewhat, but when I hit forty, I found out I have Hashimoto’s disease and likely other autoimmune issues, considering my family history. I believe hair loss runs in my family to some extent but the autoimmune situation really kicked up the jams. I read all these stories and see myself in them. I have these days I hate everyone for ever telling me my hair was beautiful. I try to tell people I know I’m losing my hair and they’re all like, “No, no, no” in denial, others go on to say, “You’re just sick, it’ll come back” or a host of other equivocations. No one says, “You are strong. You will find a way to cope with this.” It makes me so alone in my everyday life that no one will just say that. On top of going through this alone, these people make me think, am I crazy? Is it normal to be able to see all the way from the front of my hair to the back at my age even in bad light? Is it okay tons of hair falls out of my head every time I shampoo, comb, or just touch it? I see the evidence plainly but meet this wave of denial from others, I’m 44 and over 3 years it’s all falling out faster than before. My hair looks worse than my 80-year-old grandmother’s did at her age. I just want to tell someone I’m strong but I get scared. I’m scared I won’t get a job looking like this. I am JUST SO SCARED.

I tell people I am going to shave it when it no longer looks any way I can tolerate it and I mean it. No one believes me about that, either. I’m so tired of watching it fall out in bunches no matter what I do.

Thank you for this gift today, when I needed it most, by posting a video in which I could see a living woman tell me what you had to say. You showed me your hair so I could see someone else has this problem and I’m not alone and not crazy. You did this to show you care about others. Bless you. πŸ™‚ Today, you saved my heart from breaking again. *hugs*


Gls February 8, 2014 at 12:45 pm

Thank you so much Hellcat! and also everyone else for sharing their stories.
I have been feeling so down and hopeless the last few days trying to come up with another solution that probably won’t work for my hairloss. I have female pattern thinning and it’s been going on for so long that I am just tired of trying to find a solution at the risk of my mental and physical health. I’m getting to the point where I don’t want to try anything else and just accept it, wear supplemental hair and move on. I feel good wearing “extra” hair but I have difficulty coming out of the shower and at night when I get ready for bed. The reality hits me hard then. Thanks and hugs to everyone here.


Hellcat February 8, 2014 at 3:37 pm

Mercurie- I am so sorry to hear about your Hashimoto’s πŸ™ I know exactly what you mean about people that tell you “it isn’t that bad” or “it will come back”. I heard “It is probably just stress” more times than I could count, and while they mean well, it is not helpful at all, sometimes really angering. And watching it happen in the mirror is terrifying. I hope you find comfort here, and I’m so glad you found the video helpful. We’re seriously in this together!
Gls- I’m there. I decided I have mourned the loss of my hair for 6 years. I’m done. I know I will still have hard days, but I’m ready and excited to wear hair full time. When you get there, I hope you feel as gorgeous as ever πŸ™‚


Gaby February 12, 2014 at 5:29 pm

Mercurie-I feel for you since I also have Hashimoto and I have been dealing with alopecia on and off since I was a young girl.
Things do get better step by step.The past year and half I had to overcome many upsetting situations: being diagnosed with Hashimoto, going on thyroid medication, losing all my body hair, being premenopausal, going through divorce ,being introduced to anti-anxiety and sleeping pills for the first time and finding myself in an empty home since my youngest son went off to college. I survived and discovered to be a strong woman no matter all the adversities. If you will get to the point of having to wear a wig, go ahead don’t worry , you will learn to love your new look, and believe me no one will know your secret if you choose so. It’s so liberating most of the times!
Gaby πŸ™‚


Mom77 February 15, 2014 at 5:23 am

Thank you for that!! I think one of the hardest parts for me is starting to lose my hair in my late twenties. It’s scary because I keep thinking, what am I gonna look like when I’m forty??? It’s good to know I’m not alone…


Hellcat February 16, 2014 at 8:29 am

Mom77- you are gonna look gorgeous! Because you are going to find what works for you πŸ™‚ It is definitely trial and error, but there are lots of options out there. The same thought went through my head a few months ago, but keep checking out how others are dealing. You are sooo not alone.


Stacy February 16, 2014 at 2:03 pm

You’re awesome. And so so beautiful.


SYY February 16, 2014 at 10:46 pm

Hello Hellcat!

Thanks so much for sharing – I totally feel the same way…Are you thinking of getting a wig actually? I think that my hair situation is similar to yours – so would be interesting to know how you feel about that..I believe we still have too much hair for a wig – isn’t this ironic?

Looking forward to more videos!


Hellcat February 17, 2014 at 9:48 am

Stacy- thank you so much <3

SYY- I am totally wearing wigs now. I know there are some who don't believe my hair loss is advanced enough to warrant it, but where exactly is that line? I feel like the line is when it begins affecting your confidence, and mine was certainly beginning to suffer. Who has the right to tell you when you should feel what about your own head of hair? Just you πŸ™‚ There hasn't been a single day I have regretted wearing hair. Thanks for your comment, and thank you for watching my videos!


Rukhsana February 17, 2014 at 11:09 am

Thank you so much for this video. I can relate to it in so many ways. I am definitely having a crawl-under-the-blanket type day today. I also decided to confront a mirror and noticed that my hair loss is progressing much faster than I thought possible. I am only 24. I noticed hair loss after discontinuing birth control pills when I was 22. Female-patterned hair loss doesn’t just “run” in my family, it has plagued my aunts, my mother, and my female cousins. Since I was a teenager, I have been preparing for the moment where my hair would start thinning. I am also of South Asian descent, and it seems that our people experience hair loss more drastically than other ethnic populations. But still, it caught me completely off guard that the process happened so quickly.

I had discontinued BCPs before and not experienced hair loss, so the last time I did, I thought it would be the same deal. And like you, I also thought that, despite the family history, I wouldn’t experience hair loss until at least my mid to late 30s, when my mom first noticed hers. I also can’t tell if Rogaine is helping. I switched to 5% from 3% (a formulation sold by a hair clinic — so I have no way of knowing whether it was just snake oil) recently. A friend recommended that I start using photo documentation, something I put off because I didn’t want to, as I put it earlier, confront the mirror. Well, I just took what will hopefully be a “before” photo. It was devastating for me.

I think what is causing me the most anxiety, however, is the fact that I am seeing someone I really care about. We’re in love. Our relationship is pretty serious. But at the same time, we have known each other for less than a year. And we have had to deal with circumstantial complications beyond our control. For example, this fall, he has move to another city for a year for work. The biggest challenge is that our families are of different religious backgrounds, and his parents are vehemently opposed to our dating. We are willing to work through these obstacles. I don’t want to bring up hair loss, however, because I am already afraid that he will leave me due to stress from the burden of a long distance relationship and/or his family. If I mention that I am balding, how will he take that news? It sounds silly β€” obviously, it would be cruel to leave someone over his or her appearance alone. But when you compound that with various other factors, my confession might make him see me in a different way. And the last thing I want is to rock the boat.

Hellcat, I sort of noticed that you have an engagement (and wedding?) ring. How did you talk to your partner about hair loss and wearing supplemental hair? At what point did you bring it up? How did you deal with the fact that your partner might not find you attractive? (I think you are stunningly beautiful, by the way!)

My mom has also scared me into not wanting to tell my boyfriend. I’m not sure why. I think partly because my hair loss may not be noticeable to him yet, so he might think I’m overtly neurotic and insecure. But it is becoming increasingly stressful to hide my routine from him (he keeps asking me what kind of vitamins I’m taking, and the other night he mentioned I smell like men’s deodorant β€” from the 5% men’s Rogaine I just switched to, no doubt!). When is a good time to tell a significant other? When things are really, really serious, or early on in a relationship? You mentioned that Toppik works really well β€” my mom has told me to just not tell him and to hide it. But when you spend hours on end with a person, it becomes really stressful and difficult to do that.

This has been an internal point of contention for me lately. I think that if I were single, or dating a balding guy (my boyfriend has beautiful, thick hair), this might be much easier to deal with. Any advice you have would be appreciated.


Hellcat February 17, 2014 at 8:21 pm

Hi Rukhsana,
First, thank you for feeling comfortable enough to share your story. You certainly have a weight on your mind, and understandably so. I’m so sorry to hear that it is hitting so hard today.
You present a difficult and complex situation. My first thought is that if this is an issue that both your ethnicity and your family clearly suffer from, (provided he has met the women in your family) I imagine it will not surprise him when you bring it up. He may already be expecting that it will happen at some point.

When I told my (now) husband we were in a very unusual place. We had dated for years earlier, split up for 4 more years, but when my dad passed he came to help me and my family get through it. I guess because that had been my rock bottom, it simply came out of my mouth that on top of everything happening, I was pretty sure my hair was falling out, too. We weren’t even dating then and he didn’t see what I meant about my hair. He says it was years later that he actually saw what I was talking about, and only then because another friend asked about it. After I cut my hair (and noticed that it still looked pretty thin) I started a slow decline into depression, and this he did notice. I can’t imagine watching my hair loss progress and not having him to look to for comfort/support. I am also terrible at hiding things, so even under other circumstances I don’t think I could have hid it for long. I don’t think I would have wanted to either. This is the person you want to stand by you through it all, and you plan on standing by him. While it may not be hair, I’m sure he has insecurities that will impact your relationship as well. From what I’ve noticed, men seem to worry about our hair so much less than we do. He loves you for how you act when you are together and how you make him feel. He loves you for your character and thoughts. What will be important to him-I hope- is that you feel confident. If it takes a topper, wig or integration system to do that, then so be it! It would have been so much more harmful to my relationship had I tried to deal with the low confidence and depression and then added the stress of hiding it from someone I live (or are going to live) with.

What if you ask your mom why she suggests hiding it? How is her relationship/ marriage? Definitely consider her point, but look at if it fits with your relationship. Every partnership is different, but our moms do know us well. You guys certainly have challenges in front of you. Long distance is no picnic and the family situation is a really difficult one, but I think that approaching things openly and supportively will be the healthiest option. I hope the best for you guys, and keep us updated on how you are doing.


Rukhsana February 18, 2014 at 7:24 am

Hi Hellcat,

Thanks so much for getting back to me! Reading your reply has made me feel a lot better. Oddly, I guess it’s comforting to know that many other women have felt as sad as I do about my hair loss. Perhaps my depression means I’m on the road to acceptance. I never really considered that my boyfriend might be expecting it to happen. He met my mom but I don’t think he noticed her hair loss at all. She uses Toppik.

I’m really sorry to hear about the passing of your dad. It seems like your husband has always been so loving and caring from the beginning. He sounds like a great guy.

You asked about my mom, specifically. She actually called me yesterday right when I was in the middle of having a meltdown. My mom didn’t realize how depressed and worried I was about my hair, and especially about whether or not to tell my boyfriend. Without my even saying anything, she told me that I should tell him when I’m ready. I guess the verdict is clear on that one.

She and my dad are at a really great point in their marriage. He, of course, loves her and thinks she’s beautiful. Her hair loss wasn’t noticeable until they had been married for 10 years. At that point, there was a lot of other stress they were coping with, such as balancing work and home life. But I think you have a great point there: Look at how all of these issues fit into our relationship. I can’t really compare everyone else’s partnership to mine. I hope that I’ll have the courage to tell him soon. I’m looking forward to the rest of your videos! Thanks so much for being so gutsy and honest.


Julie February 26, 2014 at 4:52 pm

Good for you for sharing. We need to take hair loss out of the closet. My hair loss was so devastating, I will never forget it and how I felt. I ended up buying a Follea hair piece and it was the best money I’ve ever spent. Thank goodness my hair has started growing back. White and curly…I am brown and straight. So now I look like a Chia Pet but I’ll take it. I need my Follea girl to cover up the incredible frizz. I am telling everyone about my purchased hair. It’s amazing. I look normal after a year of hell. I actually leaned down to kiss my cat and shed hair on her, ha ha.


Hellcat March 3, 2014 at 6:12 pm

Julie, thank you for sharing as well. Glad to hear your hair is making a return πŸ™‚ I love my wigs- I’m wearing them full time now. What a miracle they are!


Kari March 8, 2014 at 12:49 pm

Thank you for your honesty! I feel like you stole my story…much the same! Started in my 20s, went to all the docs..all said it was just male pattern baldness and all I could hope for was a hair transplant one day. Then, I got into going more and more blonde, til I realized I hated being a blonde. πŸ™‚ I am 38 now, and my hair loss has gotten worse (I kept thinking how good your hair looks πŸ™‚ ) but it was always something I wanted to hide. I, too, have had great results with x-fusion (I think it’s better than Toppix), but am at the point of heading to buy my first topper. (I’m tired of always buying more b/c I use it quickly, too, and constantly wiping brown flecks off my forehead. πŸ™‚ It’s so great to know we’re not alone. Thanks, gals, for being so real and honest. For so long, I thought it was only me and a few handfuls of women I’d see here and there. God bless you gals.


PT March 10, 2014 at 8:57 am

Hi Hellcat,

Thanks for posting this video. I am 24 years old and noticed my hair seriously thinning about a month ago.Ive been to a dermatologist and I was diagnosed with AGA. I am devastated. I am set to start law school in August and it is something that I have worked so hard for and looked forward to for so long and now nothing excites me not even that. AGA has completely blindsided me. Although I am grateful to have found this website I also DON’T want hairloss to cause me to be a prisoner in my own body. I DON’T want my 20s to pass me by. I DON’T want to be insecure, self-conscious or anti social–although that is exactly how I feel now. I don’t want this to rule my life by praying for a cure or constantly looking for the next thing. I want to accept this and move on with my life but of course it’s easier said than done. From what Ive read there is very little you can do when it comes to AGA and I need to accept it.

I know you were around my age when you started seeing your hair thinning. I was wondering if you could go back and talk to your panicked self at 25…What would you say to her? Would you change anything? I would appreciate some encouraging words. I am trying to be positive and accept this early on…Thank you for your honesty in this video.


Hellcat March 13, 2014 at 6:51 pm

Hi PT,
Congratulations on law school! What an achievement- even if it doesn’t feel that way at the moment. It brought a tear to my eye to read what you are going through, to remember how hurtful it was and you are exactly right- I was panicked.

What would I have told myself? I would have said join this network (and no one is paying me for that endorsement, lol). I would have said there are so many women that know what you are going through, that want to help you and have felt how hard it is. I would have said cry for your hair, because it really is gone. But then realize that you can own it instead of it owning you. That hair loss has no right to take your happiness from you, and you will not allow it to. I would have skipped the vitamins, Rogaine and shampoos because more important than wasting my time, I wasted my hope. That was damaging and prolonged my hurting. It must work for some women though, and the only way to know is to give it a shot. There are more treatments I have not tried, but I find more peace deciding that I would rather wear hair. I refuse to hold out for months (which add up to years) to see if maybe this “one” could possibly work. I would have started having fun buying the hair I always wanted YEARS ago.

You are already being courageous. I can tell by your research and I can tell by your tone πŸ™‚ . Someone as proactive as you does not stay knocked down for longer than absolutely necessary. You have strength even if you don’t feel it now. You have beauty even if you are the only one that can’t see it, and you have value even if you don’t remember exactly why. It is hard because no one can tell you how long it will take to get on with your life, but I spent 6 years feeling terrible about it, and then I discovered all the women here and 2 months later have never felt better. I wish you all the luck finding your happiness again because you deserve it.


Hellcat March 13, 2014 at 6:57 pm

“Then, I got into going more and more blonde, til I realized I hated being a blonde.” This made me smile, one of my newer wigs is pretty blond and I just can’t get used to seeing my reflection. As I understand it, toppers can take some getting used to, but the freedom of going anywhere knowing your head looks great is worth so much! Here’s to feeling less alone through hair loss and great (maybe supplemental) hair days ahead!


Rukhsana March 15, 2014 at 8:52 am

I have an update to share. I told my boyfriend about my hair loss. I found an opportunity when he said that one of his friends whom he hadn’t seen in awhile was balding really badly. My boyfriend said he was shocked, and felt terribly for his friend. He said he felt grateful that he has good genes and really thick hair, despite the fact that a lot of his friends haven’t been so lucky. He noticed that I got really quiet, which is unusual for me, and asked me what was wrong. So I calmly told him that I am losing my hair and that I, like his friend, have unfortunately inherited this from my family. He said he was really sorry (about bringing up his friend’s issue), and that he didn’t know (and can’t tell). I told him that I cover it up (didn’t go into detail about scalp concealers) and so does my mom (he said that her hair looked fine to him as well). He was being so understanding that I even threw it out there that I use Rogaine. I also him that I might wear supplemental hair one day. We ended up having an interesting conversation about wigs. He asked me to point out to him if I ever see a woman wearing one, since I often do on the subway. More often than not, the wig is pretty realistic. He was really entertained by this (in a curious way, not a bad way). All in all, it wasn’t as big of a deal as I imagined it to be. He hasn’t brought it up since and neither have I. I’m trying not to let it control my life. This isn’t easy. But I’m much better about it now than when I pinned down a diagnosis for my hair loss.

I started using Rogaine 5% 2x a day a few months ago. I use the foam in the morning and the liquid solution at night. I also take Viviscal 2x a day. And I’ve noticed a difference! I’ve been taking photos once a month and my part is getting tighter. The hair that’s growing back isn’t glamorous by any means (just a lot of small thin strands), but it’s better than nothing. PT, you should consider Rogaine. I have also experienced extra facial hair growth, but if you don’t mind removing it, then you should definitely give it a try. I’m hoping that since I started using Rogaine at a young age, that I can buy some more time with my real hair before I possibly invest in supplemental hair.


Hellcat March 15, 2014 at 7:58 pm

So glad to hear you are having results with Rogaine! And congratulations on opening up with your boyfriend. Now you have someone who cares and is willing to support you that you can feel at peace with. You guys will only get stronger getting through challenges of life like this πŸ™‚ Thank you for sharing your update, and I wish you all the extra days you can get with your own hair, and we are here if you need us. Hugs!


Alana March 17, 2014 at 2:35 am

Hi Hellcat

Your video brought me to tears because I can relate so well to you. I’m 25 years old and have been dealing with HL for 10 or so years in silence until recently. I just posted a blog if you want to see my full story.

I’m really lost. I don’t know what to do. I’ve seen the dermatologist who prescribed me with cypreterone acetate. Have you heard of it? I haven’t seen any difference yet, and I’m currently going through the worst shedding phase of my life. Have you heard of any reviews of trichologists? I think that’s my next step, either that or a natropath.

It’s getting to the point where I can’t hide it at all anymore.

Any feedback would be appreciated πŸ™‚ x


PT March 17, 2014 at 11:01 am

Hi Hellcat,

Thank you for your touching and encouraging response. This weekend was the first time I was able to cry for my hair. That was rough but honestly this whole time I have been so panic stricken and filled with anxiety that I have not been able to cry (as much as I’ve wanted to I just couldn’t). I feel a certain relief now that I’ve cried for the first time.

After reading so much about hair loss I truly believe that the key to happiness is acceptance and I am on my way to accepting this as difficult, painful and unexpected as this maybe. I wanted to know if you could talk about your experience with wigs… I know you’re wearing them full time now. And although I am not ready to wear a wig full-time yet, I wanted to know if you tell people you wear a wig or did you just start wearing one without mentioning it. I too feel that I will start wearing wigs before it is “warranted” whatever that means, like you I feel like once my self esteem becomes affected then that’s the time for me to do something about it. I guess my biggest fear and what causes me most anxiety is coming out to people. I don’t want to keep my hair loss a secret but I also don’t want people to pity me.

I also wanted to mention that I made my mom watch your video because she has truly been my support system through this (I don’t know what I would do without her) and she cried along with me. Thank you for articulating how I feel so well. I will also show this video to my boyfriend so he can understand what I am going through better. Lastly, I want to say that you are such an inspiration and so gorgeous as well. I hope I can be as courageous as you in the very near future.


PT March 17, 2014 at 11:20 am

Thanks for the tip Rukshana!

I am not sure if I want to start using Rogaine although I haven’t completely ruled it out yet, I am happy to hear that it is working for you.

Also congratulations on telling your boyfriend! I am actually in a very similar situation as you are. My boyfriend is Muslim and I am not and it has definitely caused us to break up more than once but somehow the love we have for each other always brings us back together. He has been a true gentleman throughout my hair loss and he always knows the right things to say even if its in the form of a joke.

I am a young woman and of course my hair loss has caused me some insecurity. I would be lying to you if I said I haven’t thought of the possibility of him leaving me because of my hair (which is silly because he has never given me any reason to believe he will). What I think is key though is loving yourself and knowing that you are worthy, you are beautiful and you are more than hair. I don’t want to ruin my relationship because of my insecurities due to my hair and if for whatever reason the relationship doesn’t work out, loving myself first will assure me that my hair didn’t cause it nor will it impede me to find love again. Loving yourself is hard whether you have hair or not but I think it is very important and something I am currently working on.

Thanks for sharing your story. I am so grateful to have found this website. Good luck to everyone!


Hellcat March 18, 2014 at 1:47 pm

Thank you PT. It means the world to me that you found comfort from me sharing. It is great that you have supportive loved ones around!

I think you have a lot of wisdom πŸ™‚ There will probably be more occasions for tears about your hair, so don’t be surprised if they come but it is great that you are interested in what options may bring your happiness back even if it doesn’t mean you hair comes with it.

“if I could talk about my wigs”- I LOVE to talk about my wigs πŸ˜€ They are kind of my favorite thing ever, lol. If you are a member, check out the other videos on my profile. I’ve made them on ‘transitioning to wearing wigs’, detailed info about new wigs as I’ve gotten them, some things I’ve learned along the way, and an ‘awkward wig moment’, etc. If you are not a member, I have a youtube channel now where I upload them called ‘Hellcat and hair loss’ that is viewable to the public. To answer your question directly: I told everyone. I told my family, my students (all 170 of them), my coworkers- I just spat it out at lunch one day, I announced it on Facebook, I even told strangers that commented on my hair, I told anyone that would listen! I did this for 3 reasons. I hated the thought of hiding and hoping no one would discover it. I didn’t want to worry about if someone was staring at my hairline. Bam! Done. It was out. The second reason I told everybody was that I had started the seed of wanted to raise awareness for alopecia of all types. Being open about hair loss created the opportunity for people to ask and then I could share info about it. I know there are people hiding with it and maybe it will reach them that they are not alone. Reason 3: If I am at the point where my hair loss has left me wearing wigs, then dammit I’m gonna have fun with it! So now I buy wigs of all colors, lengths and textures. I change them like shoes. It’s awesome!! Do they itch sometimes? Yes. Are they hot? At the gym, yes. Is it worth it? Absolutely. Wigs aren’t for everybody, some women don’t find success with them. Some women love their toppers, and others go for integration systems. Lots of options are out there, but wigs are for me all the way πŸ™‚

I’m writing a book here, lol, but the last thing I’ll comment on is your mention of people pitying you. What has worked for me is owning it in the delivery. If you seem sad and uncomfortable then you will likely get those looks. I talked about it as matter of factly as I could and then had excitement in my voice about wearing different hair styles. It has been received hugely positively πŸ™‚ Thank you again for your kind words, and I wish you all the luck!


MAGR June 8, 2014 at 9:20 pm

I have had major hair loss in the past 21 months after a Brazilian Blowout treatment that went wrong. Done everything I can except for taking pills other than vitamins. This treatment gave me seborrheic dermatitis, chronic scalp inflammation, and set Androgenic Alopecia in motion. I have lost about 60% of my hair plus still falls out every time I touch and when I wash about 150 come out. A friend of mine who got a large alopecia spot on the top front of hear head (after doing in-vitro) whose hair hadn’t come back got an ozone scalp injection by a homeopathic doctor in Mexico City and the entire spot filled out. I got in touch with this doctor and may be flying there on the 15th of this month to give it a try. She does PRP with ozone injections and said that it has helped some patients thicken their hair. I was wondering if anyone has heard of such a treatment. I dont think they use ozone in the US but other countries do. My mother gets rectal ozone treatment and swears all her body pain (from a broken spine and hosteoartritis) goes away.


Michelle September 30, 2014 at 4:59 am

Thanks for the video. Pretty much how I feel. I was just diagnosed with Androgenic Alopecia and boy can it make you feel like your whole identity is gone. I know it’s not and I am not defined by my hair. I will just work on staying positive although I am sure there will be rough days but I really will work on being positive. Thanks you.


Iris December 7, 2014 at 7:24 pm

Wow, thank you so much for posting this. I know exactly how you feel, and for the longest time I thought that I was the only girl in her 20s with thinning hair. I have had a problematic, itchy and dry scalp since I was a teen, and I had extensions in my early 20s to help my head look more full. I didn’t know that they were actually causing my scalp to be more inflamed because of the constant tugging on my hair. More than anything, I just wanted to feel attractive and loved, and I thought that having thicker hair would be the answer. After going on and off of birth control, I started to notice thinning on my vertex, and freaked out. I had no idea that birth control was a cause of hair loss and now I think its NUTS that doctors just hand it out to girls without a second thought.

Anyway, I’m 26 now, and while I mostly have coverage, my hair is stringy and thin and there’s a bald spot on my vertex that can be seen in bright light. Like you said, most days you can ignore it, but some days it just really sucks. I have started avoiding looking at mirrors and blow drying and styling my hair in dim light. What makes it worse, nothing seems to be working. I have changed my diet to avoid gluten and sugar, I have gone to dermatologists and naturopathic doctors, I even started meditating and going to a therapist to manage my stress/depression, and nothing is making it grow back. I just signed up for a 5 month treatment at a clinic in Beverly Hills (I live in Los Angeles) where I get low level cold laser therapy on my scalp 2 times a week. If this doesn’t work, I don’t know what will. The before and after pictures from this place look promising, and the doctor seems confident that I’ll be successful, so we’ll see. I’m just so insecure about it all the time, and it makes dating a real nightmare. And it sucks when you feel like you’ve put so much effort into something, and it’s not making any difference. Plus, most people are very unsympathetic to my struggle. I dunno. I just really need to vent to someone who understands. If you ever want to chat or email and have someone to vent to, I would be totally ok with that.

Anyway, I’m brand new to this website, so hopefully I can find a lot of support and acceptance from women who really understand what I’m going through. Watching your video made me feel a lot better, so thank you. And for the record, you are beautiful! <3


Sonia girl January 30, 2016 at 10:39 am

Hi i’m also new to this website. I’ve also suffered with hair lose. Mine is not of the thiroid, it’s from the lisinipril that I have to take i hate it, but I have no choice they all do the same thing. My hair lately has not been falling out as much,compared to what it did before, it’s very minimal. I do a lot of reading to look for different resources to try. This web site has helped me a lot. I can’t believe there is so many woman suffering like me. I’m now trying oatmeal, and almonds, and flaxseed, (look up flaxseed for hair and vision) and it’s been working. Try pro-biotics, i read that it helps. I also find that eating foods with a lot of proteins help. Like quinoa, oatmeal with almons, quinoa, flaxseed, and rye. I add two tablespoons of ground organics flaxseed (sells at Wal-Mart in the baking section). This has really helped me. I also wash my hair once a week. I comb my hair with a wide tooth comb. When I wash my hair I don’t come it till it drys then I section each wide strand and comb out to detangle. Once I’ve done that I then comb it all out. This lessens the amount of hair loss. The thing is not to pull the hair. I used to have long hair down to the middle of my back, but had to cut it due to the amount of hair I was pulling out, cause my hair tangles easy. So cutting it has minimised the pulling, and excessive hair loss…so I hope this has helped…oh and lot’s of prayers. I hope this helps. So to all of you God bless.


Diane February 12, 2016 at 8:07 pm

Hello. Have watched your video many times. I love watching it as well as others. I am wearing hair now for a few weeks. Its a hard adjustment. I’m also thinking of shaving my head as well. Why not? What am I waiting for. This is an expensive issue. Publicly being bald is not for me. Its winter now am concerned about summer. A day at a time. I’m also going to start a new job. Oh the challenges.


Molly May 31, 2018 at 10:39 am

Thank you so much!
I’ve been losing my hair for 3 months and seeing you has made me more accepting. You are beautiful, with or without!


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