In September of 2007 Taylor shared her story with the Women’s Hair Loss Project. She has now written to share her update with us.
——————-
As of June 08 I began to be able to stand and walk, after beginning a new treatment that was made available to treat the nerve damage I had in my legs and back from my accident. Now, almost a year later I’m up as if nothing ever had gone wrong. I’m still getting a hang of the whole running thing though, it’s quite the sight. All my health issues completely disappeared, but alopecia decided to come back and pay me a visit.
My hair began to fall out in late November, just before I graduated from college. At first it was just a little more then usual when I was washing my hair. I reasoned that it was because I hadn’t brushed it for a few days so all the hair that fell out naturally had not yet been removed. It became more and more noticeable until there was just no convincing myself that I wasn’t relapsing. I was devastated because I felt that for once my life had been going right, and for the first time in so long I had the opportunity to just be a normal girl and fit in with everyone else. I felt like I was being punished, as ridiculous as it may sound.
One night in the early hours of the morning I came back to the Women’s Hair Loss Project to read what I wrote about my first experience with Alopecia. I felt like a hypocrite, talking about how inner beauty matters the most and there I was falling to pieces because I was losing my hair again. But I had to laugh at how much times had changed since re-reading what I wrote (especially about my ex!). This time around I was very lucky to have such a good support system; my amazing friends Jess and Matt who were there to pick me up off the floor and knock some sense into me. I really don’t know what I would’ve done without them. The biggest lesson I’ve learnt since Alopecia’s… graceful return is that what makes us different, makes us beautiful. Our hardships in life really define who we are as a person, and without them we wouldn’t learn and we wouldn’t grow. Alopecia makes me look unique, which is something I’ve come to embrace. I know so many people who look and act like clones, being a carbon copy of someone else would be a nightmare to me. [click to continue…]
by Rebecca on March 1, 2009
This beautiful story of inspiration, strength and understanding was written by Becca, a member of The Women’s Hair Loss Project Network.
Yesterday started like one of those days that you don’t even want to get out of bed for me. Tuesday, my 2 year old and I both had the stomach flu, so between her vomiting anything that went in and me having a mind numbing headache, we survived. My husband decided that he would take the day off yesterday to help us recooperate and maybe do the five loads of vomit laundry that we accumulated. I had to get my normal bloodwork done, I have it done every two weeks because of my hypothyroidism, so we had to find a lab that would accept my new insurance. I had some bad experiences in the past with waiting in the lobby of these places, till they actually forgot I was there and turned out all the lights. I didn’t want another experience like that, especially being sicker than I normally am.
I reluctantly put on a wig, it was colder here so no bald head outside, and we left the house. Once we got to the labcorp building I just wanted to go home and lay in bed with a bucket. After registering with what I thought was just a receptionist, she informed me she does the whole shebang, registery, bloodwork, and follow-up. While she was entering all my new information, she turned around and said, “Ya know, I was just diagnosed with what you are getting bloodwork for.” I laughed a little and said good luck! Here is a woman in her early 50’s, very put together, almost looking defeated when I said that. I realized how it came across and I explained to her that what I have is a very rare form of the disease and all my symptoms are extremely heightened. She asked me about some of the symptoms, like my hands and feet fall asleep, my joints ache, exhaustion constantly, etc. And then she mentioned hair loss. I’m not one to get embarrassed, so I just told her, “Yeah, mine is so bad, I shaved my head a few weeks ago.” She just looked at me and then told me that she too, is having hair loss in quarter sized patches and it scares her. I thought of all you ladies immediately!! I could see in her face this look of upsetedness and sympathy. I knew what I had to do for her and the hairlossproject. I told her how devastating it was for me at first and how I found support with you ladies. I told her how I cried all the time at first and really felt alone. I told her that acceptance will come, no matter what happens with her hair. [click to continue…]
When I was younger I never ever could have imagined that my destiny was to be a woman with hair loss. The thick mane (clearly on loan) that I was born with was only a temporary gift. Over the last 9 years I’ve suffered a lot, but I’ve also learned a lot. I’ve become a stronger individual and also someone is more compassionate, forgiving and understanding of others around me. I suppose depending on your religious standpoint one could argue that God had wanted to challenge me, test me and make me a better person. I’ve searched for answers high and low, a deeper understanding of why, why me? For myself to live and stay sane, I have to personally believe that there is a “reason” that this was thrust upon me at 21 years of age. So I go with that, whatever helps you sleep at night right? I practically slept through my 20’s feeling sadness and despair for the future… what will be tomorrow. I feel such a heaviness and sadness when I write that, a get a lump in my throat and my eyes begin to well up with tears. I feel a sadness for yesterday even though it’s gone and far behind. Almost like I’m mourning the years I’ve left behind, the years of hair loss. I look back and I realize it was so needless to stay in bed and hide from the world. All along the way I had enough hair to get by and not have the world know my dark little secret.
I would really like to drum that message into the minds of the women who are waking up today and realizing they are losing their hair. You still have A LOT of hair, more than you know and the world isn’t staring at it, only you are. Someone once asked me what I would do differently looking back on the years I’ve dealt with hair loss… I would have lived more. I would have said yes to more dinners and social gatherings, parties and quiet get togethers, I would have let my hair down instead of trying to hide what was only visible to myself. After all during all that time, I still had enough, but I was too focused on the worry of tomorrow to appreciate what I had today.
I am 30 years old now and don’t want to make that same mistake. There is no doubt my coping skills have far advanced over the years and I can snap out of a “down time” a lot faster. I still struggle with things like talking about my hair loss, letting others into my world. I still have a long way to go (hopefully with hair still on my head) in self acceptance, but I’m pretty proud at how far I’ve come. I still run away from mirrors and turn off lights, it is all apart of how I’ve learned to cope. I hope one day I’ll be able to stare at myself in a store window or leave the harsh lights on in the bathroom, look at my reflection and love what is looking back at me. This is me, this is who I am, I have female pattern hair loss… the hand has been dealt and now it’s is up to me to either learn from the past or guarantee myself future regrets.
~Y
http://community.womenshairlossproject.com/womenshairlossproject/
