February 2023

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If someone has taken the time to share about their hair loss, or post about it online, please don’t dismiss what they are going through. 

Comments such has:

“Your Hair Loss Isn’t That Bad,” or

“I’ve Seen Worse,” or

“Mine is Worse”

Are dismissive and hurtful, to the majority of people on the receiving end. I’m sure there are exceptions to the rule, but to myself and MANY other women comments like these are dismissive and diminish our own suffering we have had to contend with, with our hair loss.  To those that have moved on to another acceptance point in their journey, it can also be potentially quite triggering to a regressive state of a time when they experienced more pain in dealing with their hair loss. 

The struggle is already real for many women with hair loss, no need to add to it. 

Time and time again, I see women feel like they have to PROVE their hair loss. No one is claiming hair loss for the fun of it, no proof is required. 

You do not need to prove your hair loss to anyone, however much you may feel you need to, for that understanding and validation – this is true for friends, family, and online.

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Hair Loss Poem

It is OK to feel this way about your hair loss, it is.. but then we also have to process and move forward. 

Roses are red, violets are blue, I’m losing my hair and this is f’ing Bullsh*t.   I was going for more of a Haiku poem thing ? Watcha think ?

When I say I understand, I really do, and in so many ways.  I mean here I am on the 24th year of dealing with female pattern baldness, and now dealing with a second hair loss I got last year (diffuse alopecia areata) completely carving out my temples and hairline, and I think this is some bullsh*t. 

I accepted my female pattern baldness, I accepted wearing wigs, I accepted cutting my hair off (in 2013) one year after starting to wear wigs so that I could deal with my hair loss better, and by doing that accepted never being able to wear my bio hair in a pony ever again… I accepted the progressive thinning of my hair, I accepted it was never going to come back. 

I accepted, I accepted, I accepted.  

I made it all work and then life is like, wait up, one more. Here is alopecia areata for you, just to keep things interesting.

That’s life, unfortunately, and I have grappled with the understanding of how this can be… now, after all I had already been through, and accepted, but I also know there is no logic, rhyme or reason, nothing that will truly bring comfort. It just is, also the process of mind tormenting oneself with thoughts, of “why” doesn’t really help at all, least not me. 

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