No, I’m not dead 🙂 I know it’s been awhile since I’ve posted, but sometimes life just gets in the way ya know?
Onwards…
When I started losing my hair in 1999, at 21 years of age, I was certain (positive) life was over. How could I ever LIVE without having all the hair I was born with? How? I could not process that thought. I dreadfully watched myself decline and disappear through the years. I was existing, but not living.
Acceptance never came to me until I started wearing hair in 2012. Finding something that gave me back my control, with something that made me feel so helpless, really turned the tables around on my hair loss. While it was a slow and difficult journey, it was one I look back on and realize I surprisingly wouldn’t change. That seems like a ridiculous statement (and no I haven’t been drinking today… yet) especially when I used to pray day and night for my hair loss to stop and all my hair to grow back, and may promises of this and that to the high heavens above, but to no avail… my hair loss simply continued to progress. I realize now that my hair loss has helped to shape me into who I am today, my experiences and suffering has helped others, of which I am so grateful for, and I have found friendships I never thought were possible.
Hair loss provided me with a certain strength I didn’t know I had, and when my perception of what was happening changed, I found that the doors didn’t close, they opened. I am 36 years old, and it is at this point, over the past year that I really feel I have begun to find myself in many aspects, even beyond hair. Though it’s all connected. Somehow everything is always connected. There where a few critical pieces to get to where I am now. First and foremost, my amazing fiancé, who has never wavered in his love and support of me. Second, the support of the women on this site and watching others continue to live in spite of their hair loss. Third, finding Follea. What can I say, mad props (I’m dating myself now) to them… seriously. I think they are amazing. To see what wearing hair could be, was a game changer… big time. Fourth, the strong bond of friendships I have made with some women through WHLP that have taken us on amazing trips from New York, to Las Vegas to Canada in a wig wearing fiesta of awesomeness, and lastly, beginning to see a psychiatrist last Sept, taking medications for my errrr… anxiety/ OCD issues etc., and facing me. Not the hair issues, but me. We can get so consumed by our hair loss we totally forget we are so f’d up in so many other ways! Silly hair loss, and you thought it was all about you. 🙂 [click to continue…]
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