Nicole

I’ve keep losing dear people in my life, and see other loved ones get very sick, therefore finding my hair loss to be nothing in comparison. God knows I’ve spent quite a few years trying to find something that works, but pretty much gave up on finding a solution. However, recently my dear daughter’s hair loss has accelerated and it breaks my heart. I’ve been able to deal with mine and accept it for what it is, but I did not start with hair loss as young as she has. I’m in the process of looking for a good hair loss specialist and am frustrated remembering what an ordeal this is. No matter how hard we all look, we find nobody with concrete answers.
Best wishes to you always,
Melba

@Becca – congrats on going camping! I’ve never been camping in my life, it’s not because of my hair or anything.. it’s just my family wasn’t into it, so I never got the camping bug. I think wearing a low maintenance wig with bandana (at times) is a great way to go. Funny you mention the rollercoaster, it’s quite symbolic of all we have been through and continue to go through in learning to deal with our hair loss 🙂

@Karman – It never does fail! I’ve seen people from high school around town (I still live in the same area I grew up in) and while most people would just LOVE to reconnect, you’ll usually find me hiding behind a giant stack of watermelons till they pass by. LOL. But you do just gotta laugh.

@Amanda – Yes, hair loss will invariably always get in the way sometimes – but it’s how we deal with those situation that will define how happy and productive we will be. It’s definitely a challenge for all us, to say the least. I miss seeing you on here!

@mb – There is a future for you… believe that. I have adjusted to my hair loss over the years, I’m not happy with it, but I do try and control how unhappy it makes me. Yesterday was a flat hair day, i don’t know what was up. Maybe I used too much conditioner, but it was just OFF and seemingly more thin than usual. But I went out to dinner last night anyways and just brushed it off. Although.. I did have to do the old table switcheroo when I was there. I haven’t been swimming in years, but I’ve never really been fond of it anyways. Years ago I joined a gym with a pool so I could incorporate swimming into my exercise. Seemed like a great idea at the time and I did have hair loss at this point too. Turns out, I suck at swimming. I sink, I don’t float. There was like an 80 year old man in the lane next to me, just blowing through that water like a fish! LOL But what I did was put my hair in a slick back ponytail and just went in. When tons of water is on your head, it seems to make the hair not as thin looking, so the swimming seemed to be okay for me. It’s the towel dried wet hair look that says “Hey look at me, I’m balding”

@Donna – I’m sorry Donna, I’m so sorry for the pain you are in, and I truly feel your tears from here. I know what it feels like from the inner most depths of my heart. I’m glad you do use a wig though, I think it’s a wonderful option that many women don’t use, probably because it is intimidating and probably because we resent it. Why should we have to have all? We were born with hair, it’s ours gosh darn it, now give it back! That’s how we really feel, or at least how I’ve felt many times. I used to pray and pray for ALL my hair to return, eventually I prayed I just wouldn’t loose anymore, finally I just prayed for strength… if this is what I’m faced with, please give me the strength to deal with it. I’m tired of asking all the Why’s, there is no answer. Now that I know where all the chips have fallen my delusions of getting all my hair back are gone, I can confront what is left in front of me, which is me.. me with hair loss. Only we can determine how the story ends. Will we be stronger from this, or do we let it swallow us whole and miss out on life. We only get one life, it’s ours to live.

@Rachel – You are so right, every woman has their own individual insecurities. I’d prefer if mine was hidden, like in a large mole on the bottom of my foot or something… ha. That would be better. Congrats on ditching the meds. If I wasn’t afraid all my hair would fall out, I’d ditch them too. When I’m at the point of needing to wear hair, I’ll definitely being saying adios to the Aldactone and Ortho Tricyclen. Thanks for the tip on the website that has the hair coloring information. You asked a question I’ve often though about myself, “Was female hair loss so prevalent 50 or 100 years ago?” You know, I’m going to say no. Yes, they wore wigs too and could hide it that way, but I believe a HUGE contributor of women dealing with androgenetic alopecia is actually the use of birth control pills (and other medications), they prescribe them like candy to young girls. So I see more and more young girls with wide parts nowadays. I think the correlation is there for sure.

@Susan – Yes that is the doctor I went to in Florida. It’s definitely not a cure though, but I do believe it has helped me.

@Beth – Isn’t it so funny the crazy little things we probably all do, and then think we are the only ones doing it. That’s until you compare notes and go.. “OHHHHH It’s not just me” LOL. Don’t even get me started on humidity, humidity does horrible horrible things to me, and not just my hair.. well for my hair it leaves it looking like a frayed wet broomstick, and for the rest of me it swells me up!! I end up looking like shrek! A frayed straw broomstick head shrek, sexy right? I’ll make sure to cross Costa Rica off my list too. hee hee.

@Tico – Congrats on taking that step to shave your head and use hairpieces, it must be so liberating!

@Anne – I’m sorry the doctor switched you, I know his heart was probably in the right place. I think when it comes to minoxidil it is considered dose dependent, so basically… the higher percentage of minoxidil, the better. I also took the 5% before, but it just didn’t do anything for me. I think it’s possible that after having let your head heal and recover that you would be able to tolerate the 2% again. The shedding you are referring to is the dread shed. I wrote about it here:
http://www.womenshairlossproject.com/hair-loss/rogaine-shedding-help/
It doesn’t necessary mean it will happen to you, but it is definitely a possibility. I can completely relate when you said back then you had tons more hair and could afford “a little shedding” Yep, that keeps me from actually getting off my meds. Regardless of whether they are working for me, I know when I get off it will work against me and I’ll shed.. even if it stops eventually, I simply don’t have enough to spare. I’ve sat in Church many times myself praying about my hair loss, I think you are praying for the right thing… strength.

@LeAnn – It’s okay you don’t feel comfortable using your real name, look at me, I’m only an initial.
I think we’ve all sat there looking at other women our age or older thinking, “Why me, Why me Why me” I nearly get dry heaves when I see a woman in her 60s or 70s with gorgeous silver thick hair in a classic bob. I almost passed out at Nordstrom as this elderly lady flung her silver locks around. 🙂 For a big part of my hair loss life I avoided watching movies or tv because all I ever saw was amazing hair, hair I used to have, hair that was just now a far distant memory. I’m like you LeAnn, my hair was my “thing” it was the one thing I got more compliments on than anything else. I was one of those kids with a mop of hair, while other kids had thin wispy locks. Having been lucky enough to have started with so much, also afforded me the ability to loose 3/4 of it over 11 years and still have hair on my head. So I guess I should be thankful for the stockpiled follicles I started with. My mom has hair loss, but hers didn’t start till after menopause, apparently my grandmother was bald, who knew? I just recently found out. My father only started thinning in his late 60s and out of my whole family, 2 brothers included… I have the least amount of hair now.

Your identity is still there, but it is changing and evolving.. and it CAN be for the better. I think I use to hide behind my thick locks before.. they where my strength and my confidence. But now I have to get those things from some place else within, because it surely isn’t coming from my hair now. You deserve to live your life to the fullest, we cannot let our hair loss define us and shackle us to the couch. Often times we are the only ones looking at our hair anyways. Before hair loss, I never looked at anyones head.. I never saw a woman with thin hair either, because I wasn’t looking. Well neither are most people, except perhaps the other woman who is going through the same thing. Getting ready for events and gatherings can be a chore at times, but I just start prep way ahead of time, like 3 hours ahead of time. It’s important to allow time for meltdowns and cursing into the mirror 🙂 Poor a glass of wine, it always makes me feel better.

LeAnn, you can step outside of the shadow you feel you are living in. For me, it was important to let go of the picture in my head of who I WAS, the girl with the amazing thick hair is no longer, but what’s left is in many ways better than before.

I’m glad you took the time to comment, sharing is healing.

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Thank you again everyone! Reading your comments have made me cry, smile and laugh and be so thankful I have had the chance to reach you in some small way.

It’s so nice to have this site – because no one knows what you’re going through unless they, too are going through it…. God Bless…..