Comments on: One Step Back, Two Steps Forward

By: katrina

katrina — Tue, 09 Oct 2012 13:39:25 +0000

amen to that i needed to hear i am not along because i feel hair loss is a curse among us women it should have never happen to none of us never be in our DNA may god bless you and keep your head up because i am going to try my self .i need to begin to accept this thing and move on . but now i have not because it runs in my family my mom is bald on the top my sister is getting bald and me am thinning badly my dad has all his hair and he is 68 i wish i had took his genes instead of my moms i would have hair . but that’s not what god wanted for me

By: Erika

Erika — Sun, 07 Oct 2012 00:18:11 +0000

The weird thing is that this ISN’T the worst thing that has ever happened to me….but it has been the most challenging, intense and difficult. I know that doesn’t make any sense! It’s why I was so confused – and of course everyone else in my life is more confused. I’ve overcome much more overtly difficult issues before. But I have heard others say the same, that it creates so many other issues, that it’s incredibly complex – instead of more straightforward issue. I think it’s the visibility and tangibility, gradual progression (in most cases), rareness, and complex, subjective nature! It’s a mountain to climb, I’m so glad you’ve learned to give yourself credit and to feel PROUD for the ACCOMPLISHMENT. When you LOSE something, it feels like a loss or failure by definition…but what you’re gaining in the process is a remarkable strength.

By: Erika

Erika — Sun, 07 Oct 2012 00:11:00 +0000

Amazing post! There is a dark and a light side to this experience – sometimes the balance tips one way or the other. But the silver lining is always there. Thanks for the reminder to see it when other things are clouding it out.

By: Jennifer

Jennifer — Tue, 12 Jun 2012 13:47:17 +0000

To Jesse and all the other beautiful ones who have posted here, my heart goes out to you and I pray for your healing, for your body, spirit and mind! I am a 42 year old woman who has been going through this for over 2 years now and on every waking day I pray for a ‘do over’! The problem started when I got a bad perm and then stupid me gave myself a relaxer. Now I am a caucasian woman who has been licensed as a beautician so whatever went through my mind to have a relaxer is beyond me.

Needless to say, my hair was destroyed after that and my scalp as well. This I do blame on myself each and every day. I pray for this to go away and sometimes I think it wasnt just the relaxer but maybe I’m going through some kind of stress hair loss thing too because I’ve never known real sadness nor fear as I do now. I always had thin hair but I had alot of it and now I cant even run a brush through it without a ton of hair falling out or breaking off.

The positive side to this is I do have more understanding of the human condition and I feel sadness and pain for others who are hurting. Before I was a cold, judgemental person with pretty hair. This has made me look on the inside of me rather the outside. Thank God my husband is so wonderful and thinks its all in my mind. I just want to shave it off and rub my scalp and be free of constantly finding my hairs everywhere. I cant even vaccuum anymore, its so mentally draining to find my hairs in the canister rather than my dog’s hair. Is this a nightmare I’m going through where I will wake up in the morning and go whew! I’m sure glad that’s over with now I can be joyful again.

No, this is reality and as my husband tells me I have to go put my ‘big girl pants’ on and stop crying and feeling sorry for myself. So even though this is a daily torture and I would rather lay in bed and cry, I have to get up, try to fix my piddly little hair and put on a happy face and teach my precious boy (we’re homeschoolers) how valuable our lives are. We as hair loss victims must keep reminding ourselves (and I know this is so very hard!) that it’s only hair, we’re not going to die (even though sometimes I think how peaceful that would be). This is like an onion because it has so many painful layers and hurts so many ways. It hurts to see a woman with a huge full head of hair, it hurts to see old pics of how I use to look like, it hurts to think of how I loved life before this happened. I sacrifice each hair I lose to God, this doesnt really make any pain go away but it’s all I can do for now. I am sending prayers and hugs out to you all, who are suffering , that maybe someday we will understand why this is happening and that we will have the courage and strength to carry on no matter what!!

By: Danielle

Danielle — Fri, 08 Jun 2012 00:38:43 +0000

I wanted to respond to Sara – I’m also 25 and a few months ago got diagnosed with telogen efluvia. I’m not sure right now if it’s temporary or chronic. I know I’m only in the beginning but some days it feels like my life is over. I’ve had some other health issues this year – most of them have stemmed from my extemely stressful an high pressure job that I started a year ago. I was told I have very very low iron, so it could be falling out from there, or from a medicatino I was on , or from stress. I live in a big city and have so many opportunities yet some days I just want to hide in my room in my apartment. I dont even feel lik seeing friends let alone dating anymore! I have always had very long thick dark hair. People have definitely noticed that it’s thinner and now frizzy yet also stringy at the same time. I wish I could make it stop. My hair was one thing I never had to worry about going into work each morning when there was already so much stress, I always got compliments on it as well etc, so it’s literally been impossible for me to cope with.

I know this is negative – but that’s the stage I’m in right now. I apprecaite reading everyones comments and hope that I canlearn to be at peace with it some day.

By: Jessy

Jessy — Tue, 22 May 2012 16:31:29 +0000

I’m from India. The only positive think that happened is I learnt that not all people can be trusted and that not everyone has a big heart.

My hair started falling about 7 years ago. I think it was because I spent much time studying and slept for few hours. For the past 2 years I’ve been trying to sleep regularly, but I’ve been insomniac and these efforts didn’t help. We’re not well off and so I cannot rush to the doctor everytime. I don’t know why my hair continues to fall, almost 70-80% of it is gone already, that too in the front. My parents don’t think its a big issue ( this pains me a lot).

The worst thing that happened was the guy I liked left me (after 2 years) because I wasn’t pretty enough ( my hair – otherwise I’m good). That left me shattered. I’ve been depressed since then. The online tests I took ( about 5 tests) show I have severe depression.

I am an extreme introvert who feels bad to share painful things even with a close friend. I can’t bring myself to share this pain with anyone. This has left me even more desperate.

Everyone person I come across stares at my head, I wish people would look at my face when talking to me. I’m a good musician but even that doesn’t interest me. All that I think about 24×7 is my hair. When I perform, I wish there is something before me to hide me from others’ view. I don’t feel like talking to anyone, or meeting anyone new. All the musicians I perform with are guys which makes it more difficult for me.

I wish I didn’t have to go out of my house. I wish people leave me alone.
My future seems blurred.

I don’t see anything positive coming out of my hairfall.

By: Ali

Ali — Mon, 12 Dec 2011 14:12:20 +0000

Trust me I know how you feel. Here’s my story….
I’m only 24 and experiencing extreme hair shedding. In a few months I lost maybe 50- 60% of hair. All through out my life I had thick curly hair. This summer (august)I started noticing soooo much shedding. The little trash can in my room is constantly full of hair clumps. I have no idea What could have triggered this. I was never on birth control or any kind of medication and never pregnant. I went to the doctor and got blood test done and everything came back normal. He told me to take vitamins like multi, Biotin, B12, D3. They stared to work for like 2 months and the extreme shedding came back. My father and brother are bald in the front of the head but all the women in my family have great hair.

I tried talking to my parents about this, but they don’t take me seriously. I know I’m not imaging this. My hair thinned out through out my head, so much so that I think I may go bald soon. My center part looks ok but the back oh my head is so thin. I swear you can see scalp. I keep pulling out strands of hair ever time I run my fingers through it. (yes , they have little white bulbs on top of the strand)

I know something is wrong and that it’s not just genetic baldness, I just want to know what. My hair isn’t falling out in front, it’s thinning out everywhere. Also It all happened so fast, with 4-5 months loosing over half a head of hair? At first I thought it maybe Telogen effluvium, because right before my hair started to falls out my scalp kinda itched and tinged .(but I have dry scalp so i dont know) I tried thinking back to what could have caused it. I was stressed during the summer and I had poor eating habits where I would eat once a day or nothing all day, maybe that caught up with me. Another thing I thought it could be is some form of Alopecia, but I don’t see patch of bald spots .

I told my mom last night that I just want to shave my head buy a wig and end this. This is torture for a young female in her twenties to be going through this. The hardest part is thinking no on will love me if I loose all my hair. I’m totally hopeless.

I’m going to see a Doctors and Dermatologist today please pray for me.

By: WShair

WShair — Wed, 30 Nov 2011 18:32:41 +0000

What a joy to read this. I’m so happy you’ve made peace with your HL. We have no choice but to deal with whatever cards we are dealt, but do have a choice of how we let it affect us. HL sucks and hurts but peace is amazing. It allows us to kick HL in the rear so we can continue with our life which is so precious and short.

You’re right about some thinking you are nuts thinking there is anything positive about HL. However, those of us that are in a better place now totally get it. My mom always told us there are always bigger problems than our own. Nobody’s life is perfect! I’ve read comments from others who say they are better people after HL because they use to be too judgmental … now they are more accepting of others.

I love a quote that says “God puts obstacles in our way to see how we react.” Those words keeps me focused on staying positive and moving forward.

May God bless each and everyone of us with good health and protect us from harm. With those two blessings we can accomplish anything we want. Anyway, we don’t need more bitterness in this world. PEACE, GOOD HEALTH AND LOVE TO ALL.

XOXOXOXOXO

By: zarifa aziz

zarifa aziz — Wed, 19 Oct 2011 00:51:49 +0000

I can relate to the heartache and despair, how it puts your life on hold as you wait for things to turn around. What I crave is not having to think of my hair, not feelining compelled to count the hairs all day long to see if a change in the right direction has occurred. When I wash my hair I basically pat the shampoo every so gently and rinse with cool water as well. I don’t comb it immediately like I use to and then ever so gently with the widest toothed comb I could find. Hair fall continuously all day long and when I see it I get that stabbing feeling in my stomach and now I just say it’s ok, I hear you ( meaning my body is just telling me it needs to be more balanced) and I breathe…and you know when you breathe deeply and consciously it has a calming effect. The key is to stay positive no matter what the situation I believe. Keep hope alive. Really really believe that the body can and will turn around, eat healthy, get rid of anything with white flour, any wheat flour and sugar they really don’t give you any nutrition. I know it seems hard but stick with, lean meats, vegetables, fruit, brown rice, lentils, quinoa, eggs sparringly, and replace dairy with almond, or rice or unsweetened cocnut milk. Just say what the heck let me get myself as healthy as I can…and what I just started and never thought I would do or love is 3 months ago I started hot yoga. I am and will always have hope that my hair will turn around and normalize, why not. So hang in there, be sweet and loving to yourself, and know that you will always love yourself because deep down you know you are a good good person.
Breathe in deeply and breathe out slowly….

By: imadesphousewife

imadesphousewife — Tue, 18 Oct 2011 20:16:19 +0000

It’s ironic I read this message today. The last nine or so years have been miserable for me. Around the same time my hair loss started, it became obvious our daughter had something wrong. She was ultimately diagnosed with autism, and at almost nine is still non verbal, not potty trained, etc.

Anyhow, I’ve never been able to accept either issue. Today I got some new crowns put on at the dentist – I was complaining to my husband about how I didn’t like how they looked. He snapped at me that I would never be happy, and he was so sick of it. That even if I re-grew all my hair and woke up tomorrow with a normal kid, I’d still be miserable. It really hit me hard, and I’ve been pondering if he’s right.

You know what? I’m sick of it, too. I have an enormous amount of depression and anxiety that no medication has ever helped. I need to just snap out of it, and get on with life, already.

Any suggestions on how to do that?